So. Penn State. Pretty freaking awful, right? My mind and heart are having so much trouble with this. The idea that someone could victimize and abuse so many children, for so long... well, even one child is far, far too many, and yet people KNEW. There were signs, suspicions, ACTUAL EYEWITNESS ACCOUNTS. These children were let down, by so many people. There is no excuse for that.
I know my outrage and sadness is amplified because I have children of my own. I feel this more acutely than I perhaps would have a mere 6 years ago. The last two nights I've been having disturbing dreams, about children dying. One was Finn. I actually woke myself up by shouting out in my sleep, trying to get someone to help him. In the dream, I let him out of my sight, let him go with another adult, and the next time I saw him, he was dead, floating in water near other people who were doing nothing to help him. In another, I dreamt another blogger's child, a person I don't even know, died. I don't remember why, those details are thankfully hazy. I do know that in my dream, I read her blog entry, many times, in disbelief that this beautiful little boy was gone.
I wonder if these dreams aren't related to this glaring evidence that it's just so, so hard to protect our children. I want to pull Finn and Lucy in close, never let them go, never let them out into the world. So many bad things can happen.
But I can't do that, not if I want to give them a good, fulfilling life. As parents, we need to teach our children to think for themselves, to identify and avoid potential dangers, to give them the tools to find help when they need it, to look for ways to know they are putting their trust in the right people. To find a balance between shutting people out and letting people in.
Those are not easy things to teach.
I do know that starting now, I will talk to Finn, and eventually Lucy when she's a little older, about sexual abuse, in terms they can understand. This was actually spurred, not by the Sandusky allegations, but by our pediatrician during Finn's latest check up. Near the end of her physical exam of Finn, she let him know that she would need to look at his private parts. And before and during that quick exam, she quizzed him on who was allowed to look at or touch those private parts. A subject I had never thought to bring up to him. Yes, I've told him that HE can't touch OTHER people's private parts, mostly because preschoolers love all things butt-related, and I wanted to make sure he wasn't running around touching people's butts (given his propensity to touch mine). But I've never talked to him in a way that let him know that no one should be touching him inappropriately.
The doctor's message to Finn was clear: The only people that can touch/look at Finn's "private parts" (we weren't too specific with actually anatomical names yet, but that will come) are Finn himself, Mommy/Daddy, and the doctor. No one else. I'm going to reinforce that message, of course - repetition is the most effective way to get a child to learn something. But these abuse allegations have made me realize that I need to do more. I need to tell Finn that he doesn't need to do ANYTHING that makes him feel uncomfortable. He should not touch anyone else's private parts, even if (especially if) they ask him to. And most of all, if someone does touch him, or get him to touch them, IT'S NOT HIS FAULT. He doesn't need to hide it. He can tell M. and I anything, anything at all, and we will always do everything we can to help him.
Because that's the thing, right? You need to know about abuse before you can stop it. How can I make sure that, god forbid something did happen to Finn or Lucy, they tell me about it? So many victims of abuse are afraid to come forward, in part because they are embarrassed that they did something wrong. I know there are other reasons, too - they might be protecting the abuser, particularly if the abuser is a family member. They might fear retribution. But I think many times (speaking from the point of view of someone who has had no formal education on this whatsoever), abuse victims are made to feel complicit in their abuse, and that's a large part of why they don't seek help. I want to do what I can to combat that notion, preventatively, with my children. I don't really know the best way to go about that, yet, but I'll start with words. Simple conversations. Telling them over and over again, as I always do, always have done, that I will never, ever stop loving them. That they can tell me anything at all, and I will always love them.
I hate that I have to think about these things. But I do. We all do.
Are you addressing this subject with your kids at all? If yes, how are you approaching it? If no, when do you think you will?
Friday, November 11, 2011
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Vacationing in Old Stomping Grounds
M., the kids, and I are back from a quick getaway down to Williamsburg, VA. Back in the spring, I bought a Groupon for a 2-night stay, with ideas of showing the kids the campus where I went to college, foraying in to the realm of educational vacations(what with all the people-in-colonial-garb), and finally visiting Busch Gardens, a place I never managed to get to in my four years of residence there. Well, a spring vacation turned in to a fall vacation - that's just how things go, I guess, when life gets away from you. But I think we ended up with a better vacation for it. Busch Gardens was closed for the weekend, so that attraction is just going to have to stay on my "Things To Do" list. And really, did I want to schlep the kids around an amusement park? No, I didn't. So that actually worked out well. Instead, we had plenty of time to meander through the campus of the College of William and Mary, and show the kids the charms of Colonial Williamsburg. They did pretty well, all things considered. Building tours were tough - Lucy had trouble sitting through the little spoken vignettes in each room. Also, there was so much walking that they eventually fought over who got to sit in the umbrella stroller we had with us. Other than that, though, the trip was a much better fit for their age group than I expected. Soldiers with guns, fifes, drums, on horseback; blacksmiths wielding hammers on fiery red metal; horse drawn carriages; impressive looking buildings; an old "gaol"; a garden maze - we all really enjoyed it. The weather was cold but beautiful, and the crowds were much, much less than what you would see in the spring or summer. I highly recommend a visit if you can swing it.
A few photos from our trip follow. And by "a few photos," I really mean "more pictures than you'd ever care to look at."
Finn running toward the Wren building, our first stop on campus.
He was quickly distracted by a nearby cannon.
Meanwhile, Lucy made a new friend.
Then she had to try her hand (butt?) at climbing the cannon, too.
Which actually gave me an opportunity to get a somewhat decent (and very rare) photo of the two kids together.
A sub-par photo of the Crim Dell, the most scenic spot on campus. Which is saying a lot, as W&M has quite a few scenic spots!
Back at the Wren building; it looks like I have two soldiers defending me here.
An attempt (mostly failed) to corral the kids into posing for a picture.
See that smile? That's me eating a cheese sandwich from the Cheese Shop. It is the stuff of legends. Oh how I have missed those sandwiches!
Waiting for lunch at Chowning's Tavern
The Governor's Palace
In the gardens behind the Governor's Palace
A beautiful arched tree walkway in the Governor's gardens
The kids were enthralled with the maze in the garden
Finn exiting from one last spin through the maze
The day ended with a review of the soldiers - marching, fife-playing and drumming, a rousing speech from a horse-mounted Lafayette, and lots of gun shots and cannon-fires. The kids loved it.
Lucy kept calling the soldiers in red "pirates." She is still asking me where they went. I finally gave up and told her they went back to their ship. She's going to need some remedial history lessons some day.
The kids got another treat - their very own fruit flies to keep as pets/do experiments on. A friend of mine from my grad school days is now faculty at W&M, continuing his research on fruit fly development (my poison of choice for my Ph.D. in Biology). He took the kids on a tour of his lab, showed them some fruit flies under a microscope, and then gave them some to take home. I can't wait to give some classes on the life cycle of the fruit fly as soon as the larvae start digging through their food. I may need to go buy a microscope... :-).
We only have a couple of extra vials of food, so we'll need to get creative if we're going to propagate beyond the next couple of weeks. Or we'll just have to go wild - break out the empty wine bottles and start catching flies the old fashioned way!
So, that was our (long) weekend. How was yours?
A few photos from our trip follow. And by "a few photos," I really mean "more pictures than you'd ever care to look at."
Finn running toward the Wren building, our first stop on campus.
He was quickly distracted by a nearby cannon.
Meanwhile, Lucy made a new friend.
Then she had to try her hand (butt?) at climbing the cannon, too.
Which actually gave me an opportunity to get a somewhat decent (and very rare) photo of the two kids together.
A sub-par photo of the Crim Dell, the most scenic spot on campus. Which is saying a lot, as W&M has quite a few scenic spots!
Back at the Wren building; it looks like I have two soldiers defending me here.
An attempt (mostly failed) to corral the kids into posing for a picture.
See that smile? That's me eating a cheese sandwich from the Cheese Shop. It is the stuff of legends. Oh how I have missed those sandwiches!
Waiting for lunch at Chowning's Tavern
The Governor's Palace
In the gardens behind the Governor's Palace
A beautiful arched tree walkway in the Governor's gardens
The kids were enthralled with the maze in the garden
Finn exiting from one last spin through the maze
The day ended with a review of the soldiers - marching, fife-playing and drumming, a rousing speech from a horse-mounted Lafayette, and lots of gun shots and cannon-fires. The kids loved it.
Lucy kept calling the soldiers in red "pirates." She is still asking me where they went. I finally gave up and told her they went back to their ship. She's going to need some remedial history lessons some day.
The kids got another treat - their very own fruit flies to keep as pets/do experiments on. A friend of mine from my grad school days is now faculty at W&M, continuing his research on fruit fly development (my poison of choice for my Ph.D. in Biology). He took the kids on a tour of his lab, showed them some fruit flies under a microscope, and then gave them some to take home. I can't wait to give some classes on the life cycle of the fruit fly as soon as the larvae start digging through their food. I may need to go buy a microscope... :-).
We only have a couple of extra vials of food, so we'll need to get creative if we're going to propagate beyond the next couple of weeks. Or we'll just have to go wild - break out the empty wine bottles and start catching flies the old fashioned way!
So, that was our (long) weekend. How was yours?
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Holiday Gift Ideas: Spotlight on Paper Source
So, I owe the grandparents and great grandparents some photos of the kids in their Halloween costumes, but this is not that post. That post will come later-ish.
Instead, this post is an attempt to start a mini-blogging series on (as the title suggests) "Holiday Gift Ideas." I'm going to do my darnedest to gather the gift ideas I find while trolling the Internet, and share them here on a somewhat regular basis throughout the month of November. I have ulterior motives, of course. The main one being that I can never, EVER remember all of the ideas I think of for the people in my life when it's actually time to shop. I get to the mall, or open up Amazon.com, and draw a complete blank. This way I'll have a reservoir of ideas to draw from, and can skip that panicky blank-drawing feeling. And hopefully, it will help you, too. Now, family/friends, please keep in mind that while you may indeed received a gift that I highlight here, you may also get something entirely different. I reserve the right to either surprise you OR get you something that you see on one of these posts that wins raves from you.
Now, I'm not planning to have any kind of format for these posts. I may focus on a specific age group or familial relationship one day, a gift "category" another day (Scarves! Hostess gifts! White elephant gifts for the office party! Food gifts!), just throw up one idea, give you more links than you'd ever want to click on, etc. At this point, it's a mystery to even me what and when I'm going to post. We'll just have to see how this goes.
For the inaugural post, I'm choosing to focus on a particular store: Paper Source (www.paper-source.com). For no real reason other than I saw a few gift ideas on the 2011 Style Lush Holiday Gift Guide: 100 Gifts for $25 or Less from the store that I thought were adorable. In fact, a couple of the items I'm about to point out are shamelessly lifted from that guide, and you should all go check the Style Lush guide out because it has lots of other great ideas. Also, I feel like I need to state that I was not paid or compensated by Paper Source in any way, shape, or form for this post. I just like the stuff, and wanted to share it.
I browsed through Paper Source's inventory, and can tell you a couple of general things first. There are some store locations scattered throughout the country, but they are not ubiquitous (5 in Massachusetts, 2 in Maryland, etc). Your best bet is probably online shopping. I have no idea what their shipping rates are like, as I have never personally ordered anything from the company.
General pros of the store are: There are lots of creative, humorous, and retro gifts. Think Darth Vader lunch boxes and watches, band-aids that look like bacon, cocktail napkins with witty sayings, lovely stationary and paper, whimsical throw pillows, etc. There is something appropriate for nearly everyone on your list, especially if your list is heavy on females and kids. Also, I ascribe to the point of view that you should give people gifts that they'd never buy for themselves. Don't give them something they're just planning to get already. Make it fun! Make it something they think is great, but would hesitate to spend their own hard-earned money on. Spend your own, instead! This store is great for that kind of gift.
General cons are: There are no product reviews, which can make it hard to judge customer satisfaction (I personally pore over product reviews, though I try to take them all with a grain of salt). The items for kids don't always provide information on the age appropriateness of the toy/game/thing. And, finally, there's not much here for the over 13 male crowd, from what I can tell.
Without further ado, here is a selection of things that caught my eye (with many more that I'm not including - so hard to choose!):
Calendars, for me, fall under the “nice to have, but reluctant to spend $$ on, guess I’ll settle for using the free one from the zoo again this year” category. I prefer the grid type (need those little boxes so I can scribble in birthday and anniversary dates), so the one I chose, the Art Grid Calendar ($24.95), follows that style, but this site has many other types and styles to choose from. Isn't the gnome for December's picture adorable? Reminds me of the huge book about Gnomes I used to have when I was a little girl (click on pictures to enlarge):
I'm kind of patting myself on the back for this next idea - a selection of gift wrap. Give 5-6 patterns of gift wrap (prices range from $3.50 to $7.50 per item, depending on sheet vs. roll) so your gift recipient will always have gift wrap on hand for any occasion AND (bonus) much of it is pretty enough to frame! Here's a few of the many, many that caught my eye:
Birds
Robots
Butterflies
More birds. I have a bird problem.
Alphabet
Cherry Blossoms
OK, though I could go on forever posting links to the wrapping paper, I'll move on. This Mod Multi Shoulder Tote looks like it could hold ANYTHING, and it's cute to boot ($18.95):
How's about some owls? I'm totally ON the owl bandwagon.- I love me some owls!! Here's a little sampling of the cute owl things Paper Source has:
An adorable cloth Owl Rattle ($9.95):
Owl Soap-On-A-Rope, for the soap-on-a-rope enthusiast in your family (there's always at least one, am I right? And for clarification, I don't mean anything dirty by that - some people just really like soap on a rope!) ($16.95):
An Owl Cutting Board. We store our cutting boards propped up on the kitchen counter because a) they're too big/bulky for the cabinets, and b) we use them every day. But they don't exactly add spice to our kitchen. This adorable thing combines decor with function ($24.95):
A Hummingbird Wristlet Wallet, for those days when carrying a big ol' purse/diaper bag isn't going to fly (hello, girls' weekend! Date night!) ($11.95):
Remember that cute gnome from the calendar above? How about a couple of Gnome Mugs? ($6.95 per mug):
I have more glasses than any sane person actually needs, but these Retro Bike Glasses would be fun for both the hipsters and non-hipsters alike in your life ($16.95):
And finally, a few ideas for the kids...
I don't know if this is a universal kid thing or not, but both of my kids are obsessed with chapstick and regularly insist on using and mutilating my tubes. How about their very own tube, from Santa? This Rudolph's Rockin Raspberry Lip Balm would make a great stocking stuffer ($2.50):
Animal Crayons, for the art- and animal-lover child ($8.95):
Finn loves all things airplane - paper airplanes, toy airplanes, spotting every. single. goddamn. airplane that flies over head, etc. According to the description, this Flying Model Airplane kit is great for kids of all ages, so it might be the perfect gift for his stocking ($12.95):
Finn is a perfectionist when it comes to homework and artwork, and he likes to have an eraser nearby for any potential mistakes. He INSISTS on erasing his mistakes, instead of crossing them out, even though his homework is usually done in crayon. These Dessert Erasers (other food types also available) would make his day, I'm sure ($8.95):
Phew! That's it. I'm out of links, for the moment. Feel free to provide suggestions on specific types of gifts you might want me to focus on in the comments. Until next time...
Instead, this post is an attempt to start a mini-blogging series on (as the title suggests) "Holiday Gift Ideas." I'm going to do my darnedest to gather the gift ideas I find while trolling the Internet, and share them here on a somewhat regular basis throughout the month of November. I have ulterior motives, of course. The main one being that I can never, EVER remember all of the ideas I think of for the people in my life when it's actually time to shop. I get to the mall, or open up Amazon.com, and draw a complete blank. This way I'll have a reservoir of ideas to draw from, and can skip that panicky blank-drawing feeling. And hopefully, it will help you, too. Now, family/friends, please keep in mind that while you may indeed received a gift that I highlight here, you may also get something entirely different. I reserve the right to either surprise you OR get you something that you see on one of these posts that wins raves from you.
Now, I'm not planning to have any kind of format for these posts. I may focus on a specific age group or familial relationship one day, a gift "category" another day (Scarves! Hostess gifts! White elephant gifts for the office party! Food gifts!), just throw up one idea, give you more links than you'd ever want to click on, etc. At this point, it's a mystery to even me what and when I'm going to post. We'll just have to see how this goes.
For the inaugural post, I'm choosing to focus on a particular store: Paper Source (www.paper-source.com). For no real reason other than I saw a few gift ideas on the 2011 Style Lush Holiday Gift Guide: 100 Gifts for $25 or Less from the store that I thought were adorable. In fact, a couple of the items I'm about to point out are shamelessly lifted from that guide, and you should all go check the Style Lush guide out because it has lots of other great ideas. Also, I feel like I need to state that I was not paid or compensated by Paper Source in any way, shape, or form for this post. I just like the stuff, and wanted to share it.
I browsed through Paper Source's inventory, and can tell you a couple of general things first. There are some store locations scattered throughout the country, but they are not ubiquitous (5 in Massachusetts, 2 in Maryland, etc). Your best bet is probably online shopping. I have no idea what their shipping rates are like, as I have never personally ordered anything from the company.
General pros of the store are: There are lots of creative, humorous, and retro gifts. Think Darth Vader lunch boxes and watches, band-aids that look like bacon, cocktail napkins with witty sayings, lovely stationary and paper, whimsical throw pillows, etc. There is something appropriate for nearly everyone on your list, especially if your list is heavy on females and kids. Also, I ascribe to the point of view that you should give people gifts that they'd never buy for themselves. Don't give them something they're just planning to get already. Make it fun! Make it something they think is great, but would hesitate to spend their own hard-earned money on. Spend your own, instead! This store is great for that kind of gift.
General cons are: There are no product reviews, which can make it hard to judge customer satisfaction (I personally pore over product reviews, though I try to take them all with a grain of salt). The items for kids don't always provide information on the age appropriateness of the toy/game/thing. And, finally, there's not much here for the over 13 male crowd, from what I can tell.
Without further ado, here is a selection of things that caught my eye (with many more that I'm not including - so hard to choose!):
Calendars, for me, fall under the “nice to have, but reluctant to spend $$ on, guess I’ll settle for using the free one from the zoo again this year” category. I prefer the grid type (need those little boxes so I can scribble in birthday and anniversary dates), so the one I chose, the Art Grid Calendar ($24.95), follows that style, but this site has many other types and styles to choose from. Isn't the gnome for December's picture adorable? Reminds me of the huge book about Gnomes I used to have when I was a little girl (click on pictures to enlarge):
I'm kind of patting myself on the back for this next idea - a selection of gift wrap. Give 5-6 patterns of gift wrap (prices range from $3.50 to $7.50 per item, depending on sheet vs. roll) so your gift recipient will always have gift wrap on hand for any occasion AND (bonus) much of it is pretty enough to frame! Here's a few of the many, many that caught my eye:
Birds
Robots
Butterflies
More birds. I have a bird problem.
Alphabet
Cherry Blossoms
OK, though I could go on forever posting links to the wrapping paper, I'll move on. This Mod Multi Shoulder Tote looks like it could hold ANYTHING, and it's cute to boot ($18.95):
How's about some owls? I'm totally ON the owl bandwagon.- I love me some owls!! Here's a little sampling of the cute owl things Paper Source has:
An adorable cloth Owl Rattle ($9.95):
Owl Soap-On-A-Rope, for the soap-on-a-rope enthusiast in your family (there's always at least one, am I right? And for clarification, I don't mean anything dirty by that - some people just really like soap on a rope!) ($16.95):
An Owl Cutting Board. We store our cutting boards propped up on the kitchen counter because a) they're too big/bulky for the cabinets, and b) we use them every day. But they don't exactly add spice to our kitchen. This adorable thing combines decor with function ($24.95):
A Hummingbird Wristlet Wallet, for those days when carrying a big ol' purse/diaper bag isn't going to fly (hello, girls' weekend! Date night!) ($11.95):
Remember that cute gnome from the calendar above? How about a couple of Gnome Mugs? ($6.95 per mug):
I have more glasses than any sane person actually needs, but these Retro Bike Glasses would be fun for both the hipsters and non-hipsters alike in your life ($16.95):
And finally, a few ideas for the kids...
I don't know if this is a universal kid thing or not, but both of my kids are obsessed with chapstick and regularly insist on using and mutilating my tubes. How about their very own tube, from Santa? This Rudolph's Rockin Raspberry Lip Balm would make a great stocking stuffer ($2.50):
Animal Crayons, for the art- and animal-lover child ($8.95):
Finn loves all things airplane - paper airplanes, toy airplanes, spotting every. single. goddamn. airplane that flies over head, etc. According to the description, this Flying Model Airplane kit is great for kids of all ages, so it might be the perfect gift for his stocking ($12.95):
Finn is a perfectionist when it comes to homework and artwork, and he likes to have an eraser nearby for any potential mistakes. He INSISTS on erasing his mistakes, instead of crossing them out, even though his homework is usually done in crayon. These Dessert Erasers (other food types also available) would make his day, I'm sure ($8.95):
Phew! That's it. I'm out of links, for the moment. Feel free to provide suggestions on specific types of gifts you might want me to focus on in the comments. Until next time...
Saturday, October 29, 2011
I'm Not Bragging, I'm Seeking An Intervention
M. was gone most of last week, and I was like a Martha-Stewart-in-training while he was gone. I somehow get it into my head, every time he goes away (lately), that I can be this superwoman who does everything I normally do, AND everything he normally does, and then a little bit more. It's a bit of a sickness, really. I try to work out most days, keep the house picked up, do laundry... when really, I should just work on sleeping and keeping everyone on time. Maybe some day I'll actually prioritize those two things (I hope!).
M. left very early Monday morning. I got the kids up, dressed, and delivered to school. I went to work, worked a full day, ran errands in the middle of the day (gas in car, baked goods purchased for office party). Picked up the kids, cooked dinner (fish, pan fried, with vegetables, didn't slack), did all the dishes and set up lunch/coffee maker for next day, gave kids a bath, put them to bed, picked up house for the next day's visit from the cleaning woman (this is no easy feat), and ran on the treadmill. I showered, Facebook'd, and fell into bed.
On Tuesday, I again got the kids (and myself) up, dressed, and delivered to school/work. I worked a full day, went to the gym at lunch time, picked the kids up, stopped at Burger King for a dinner that was consumed in the car (a bit of a cheat, but it was the last week of soccer, so I deemed that occasion treat-worthy), and brought both kids to Finn's soccer class. I cheered Finn on and wrangled Lucy, nearly losing my shit trying to get both kids, two soccer balls, and BK leftovers to the car once it was over, but holding it together (barely). I shuffled the kids into bed (there was yelling, I'm afraid), and ate my dinner while making these delightful ghost meringues for the kids' Halloween party on Friday. Mine didn't come out quite as well as the ones I was trying to emulate, but they're not half bad:
I did a load of laundry, took out the recycling, showered, caught up on the Internet, and collapsed into bed at around 11 pm.
On Wednesday it was more of the same - kids up and out, full day of work, dinner, (I made quesadillas), kitchen-cleaning and next day prep (coffee and lunch), Finn's homework help, bathtime (oops, no, didn't do bathtime, I got too mad at the kids for various infractions and refused to bathe them), bedtime, scooping out the cat's litter box, taking out the trash, and an attempt a treadmill jog. I say attempt because I had to stop twice to comfort a crying Lucy, who was supposed to be sleeping. I finally gave up after only 32 minutes, showered, hung some newly arrived decor on the playroom walls, and headed to bed. But also somehow squeezed in a load of laundry to wash the clothes from Lucy's potty accident (a direct result of me declaring her potty trained, I'm sure). Began long night of several Lucy wake-ups. Turns out she had a double ear infection and would shortly (Thursday morning) also develop pink eye.
That pretty much ends the over-achieving aspect of my time as a single parent.The rest was just survival until M. came home. Thursday morning I already had a doctor's appointment scheduled for Finn (5-year well visit), so we all slept a little late. I called just before heading in, and begged for a sick visit for Lucy, even though she was not (yet) running a fever. About 10 minutes before I made that phone call, I noticed her right eye was pink and crusty. Before that moment, I was going to just bring her with me to Finn's appointment (to get her a flu shot) and, while we were with the doctor, try to swing a quick ear check JUST in case. But my guilt took over once I realized she really, probably, definitely, was sick - I figured we'd need a longer appointment and that we should really pay the sick visit co-pay (don't have one for the well visits). After that visit, my fate for the day was sealed. I would not be going to work, Lucy would not be going to daycare. We dropped Finn off at daycare, picked up Lucy's antibiotics, and headed home for a day of "entertaining the toddler while trying to get some work done." All while fighting the exhaustion from the multiple middle-of-the-night wake-ups the night before. We gave up around 4:45, picked up Finn, cooked dinner (vegetarian BLTs), and welcomed our much-missed M. home. Thank God.
I would like to note that I had not one single glass of wine while M. was gone. Frankly, there just wasn't any time.
I had 3 glasses on Thursday night, though.
In conclusion, I'm probably crazy. I'm definitely exhausted. Also, here are some pictures of what the playroom looks like now that we've kid-ified it even more:
Robot decals on the walls (source)
A place to display the kids' artwork
How it looks together
A little geography fun (U.S map and World map)
New rug, perfect for driving cars (Source)
M. left very early Monday morning. I got the kids up, dressed, and delivered to school. I went to work, worked a full day, ran errands in the middle of the day (gas in car, baked goods purchased for office party). Picked up the kids, cooked dinner (fish, pan fried, with vegetables, didn't slack), did all the dishes and set up lunch/coffee maker for next day, gave kids a bath, put them to bed, picked up house for the next day's visit from the cleaning woman (this is no easy feat), and ran on the treadmill. I showered, Facebook'd, and fell into bed.
On Tuesday, I again got the kids (and myself) up, dressed, and delivered to school/work. I worked a full day, went to the gym at lunch time, picked the kids up, stopped at Burger King for a dinner that was consumed in the car (a bit of a cheat, but it was the last week of soccer, so I deemed that occasion treat-worthy), and brought both kids to Finn's soccer class. I cheered Finn on and wrangled Lucy, nearly losing my shit trying to get both kids, two soccer balls, and BK leftovers to the car once it was over, but holding it together (barely). I shuffled the kids into bed (there was yelling, I'm afraid), and ate my dinner while making these delightful ghost meringues for the kids' Halloween party on Friday. Mine didn't come out quite as well as the ones I was trying to emulate, but they're not half bad:
I did a load of laundry, took out the recycling, showered, caught up on the Internet, and collapsed into bed at around 11 pm.
On Wednesday it was more of the same - kids up and out, full day of work, dinner, (I made quesadillas), kitchen-cleaning and next day prep (coffee and lunch), Finn's homework help, bathtime (oops, no, didn't do bathtime, I got too mad at the kids for various infractions and refused to bathe them), bedtime, scooping out the cat's litter box, taking out the trash, and an attempt a treadmill jog. I say attempt because I had to stop twice to comfort a crying Lucy, who was supposed to be sleeping. I finally gave up after only 32 minutes, showered, hung some newly arrived decor on the playroom walls, and headed to bed. But also somehow squeezed in a load of laundry to wash the clothes from Lucy's potty accident (a direct result of me declaring her potty trained, I'm sure). Began long night of several Lucy wake-ups. Turns out she had a double ear infection and would shortly (Thursday morning) also develop pink eye.
That pretty much ends the over-achieving aspect of my time as a single parent.The rest was just survival until M. came home. Thursday morning I already had a doctor's appointment scheduled for Finn (5-year well visit), so we all slept a little late. I called just before heading in, and begged for a sick visit for Lucy, even though she was not (yet) running a fever. About 10 minutes before I made that phone call, I noticed her right eye was pink and crusty. Before that moment, I was going to just bring her with me to Finn's appointment (to get her a flu shot) and, while we were with the doctor, try to swing a quick ear check JUST in case. But my guilt took over once I realized she really, probably, definitely, was sick - I figured we'd need a longer appointment and that we should really pay the sick visit co-pay (don't have one for the well visits). After that visit, my fate for the day was sealed. I would not be going to work, Lucy would not be going to daycare. We dropped Finn off at daycare, picked up Lucy's antibiotics, and headed home for a day of "entertaining the toddler while trying to get some work done." All while fighting the exhaustion from the multiple middle-of-the-night wake-ups the night before. We gave up around 4:45, picked up Finn, cooked dinner (vegetarian BLTs), and welcomed our much-missed M. home. Thank God.
I would like to note that I had not one single glass of wine while M. was gone. Frankly, there just wasn't any time.
I had 3 glasses on Thursday night, though.
In conclusion, I'm probably crazy. I'm definitely exhausted. Also, here are some pictures of what the playroom looks like now that we've kid-ified it even more:
Robot decals on the walls (source)
A place to display the kids' artwork
How it looks together
A little geography fun (U.S map and World map)
New rug, perfect for driving cars (Source)
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